new chapter of sorts
an opportunity to de-clutter and leave some things behind.
we have one more week to spend together. i've purchased bus and plane tickets. all in all, we've been physically together for three months.
it feels so fast.
i am now mentally preparing for the upcoming loneliness and the solitude that comes with living alone. solitude is always good, in a way. it gives me all the space that i need for self-improvement.
get more fit. read books. listen to music. cultivate a good living space. figure my life out. find ways to be happier inside and make myself laugh. food. movies. a little bit of city life.
i try not to think of surfing anymore. when i see pictures of waves it's like seeing pictures of pastry while on a low-fat, low-calorie diet. i have a sweet tooth. i have a huge appetite for adventure. but right now...i gotta stay at home. to save money. because he doesn't like me going out and possibly cheating on him.
BUT i will have a one-week surf trip maybe a couple months from now. i can't not go surfing. but i can only go surfing if he's in the line up with me.
we've talked about this countless times. there's a reason why his relationship with baby mama #2 didn't work out, and it was because she loved drinking and going out and being such a cute social butterfly.
sigh. i told myself i won't be thinking about any of this. anyway. back to my life.
i am moving to a new apartment and i am excited, although stressed. it's an opportunity to de-clutter and leave some things behind. especially clothes.
i haven't picked out where to move yet and i must start visiting new homes in a week or so.
then it's down to packing and moving things bit by bit. figure out what to do with big items.
it's going to be a new chapter of sorts for me (i love beginnings). i am excited to do good things for myself and try to be a good person for once.
maybe i'll start crocheting. or calligraphy. or just try not to go back to cigarettes and marijuana and casual sex.
continue writing here in write.as, whatever it is that i am writing.
save money. stay sane. grow my hair. maybe lose weight.
there's many things to do. being depressed shouldn't be one of those.